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Saturday, July 2, 2011

Avoid The Perils Of Online Dating For Seniors

Finally, online dating for seniors has given us a real way of meeting potential life partners. Forget joining the local aged veterans club, or the cookery course for the over 55 or Yoga for the mature age group.  Now you can join a website and within minutes have access to a group of individuals who are looking for partners and actually know who Bob Hope and John Wayne were.

Ok so that last comment was meant as a joke. But seriously mention online dating clubs to most people, of a certain age, and they automatically think you are trying to hook up with a twenty five year old. 

Online dating for seniors opens up a world of opportunity that generations before us couldn't dream of. Not only can you find someone who has the qualities you admire most but the fact that they are a member means that they are also looking for someone special.   


So how do you find your Mr or Mrs Right?  Well there is no "fail safe way" but it helps if you give the process a chance. Despite what the movies may say, less than a quarter of happily married women "knew" that the man they were dating was the "one" on the first couple of dates.  Love is like a delicate flower - it needs time and attention to mature to its full promise. So the moral of the story is that you should give a new friendship time to mature. Unless of course, you are obviously incompatible. 

Using an online service allows you to build up friendships via email or instant messenger before you have to talk to the person.  Often, probably due to the anonymity, we get closer quicker to people we have only met on email than we would if we meet them in person. 

When preparing for your first date, think about the first impression the other person is going to get. If it has been a while since you were out socially, you may be stuck in a time warp. I'm not suggesting you need to become a fashion victim but get a good friend to vet the outfit you choose; to double check the image you are projecting. Mutton dressed as lamb is never attractive for either sex!

Make sure that you stick to the following rules when using any dating service. Until you have complete trust in the other person i.e. have met in person and preferably more than once,

1) Communicate via the agencies internal secure email system. Do not give out your home or cell number, or your full name and address.

2) Always meet in a public place

3) Always, always have your own transport home. Get a friend, family member or have a taxi booked for a specific time to collect you.

Abide by these simple rules and you will have no problems avoiding the perils of online dating for seniors. Who knows, it could turn into an enjoyable way to spend an evening or two. Or it may turn into a lifetime commitment for both of you.

Why Go To Dating Sites For Seniors

So you are looking to find someone to share those golden moments with you.  So why should you try dating sites for seniors?

Well there are a lot of reasons. 

Culturally, we have been moving away from the family unit and therefore you are less likely to know your neighbors than in times gone by. This means that it can be rather difficult to find potential partners particularly in the older age group.

A lot of older people are more reserved and thus not likely to hang around pubs and clubs looking for a partner.  The usual venues open to younger singles looking for a date aren't always an option.

Some people cannot face putting up a personal ad in the newspaper.  Contrary to popular opinion, this can be a great way to meet people but it is not suitable for everyone.

You could join a dining club.  The idea is that instead of meeting just one person for dinner which can be daunting, you meet a group of people for dinner and a chat.  Usually dining clubs would be arranged based loosely on age and you can expect to pay upwards of twice the cost of the meal.  They can be an excellent introduction to a new crowd of people but often the organisers complain that they never have enough men.

You could head to Lisdoonvarna in Ireland.  Every year they hold a huge singles event. People of all nationalities, sexual orientation and age descend on the area for the weekend.  Possibly not the best place to meet your life partner but you should enjoy a great holiday.

If you don't fancy the above ideas, dating sites give you the opportunity to meet people of your own generation who share similar likes and interests.  You cannot rely on your natural charm and good looks to get you a date, so most serious online daters learn how to court in the old fashioned sense of the word.  They know that they need to communicate properly - think of emails being the modern version of the courtship letters of bygone days. 

The internet is anonymous - this allows people to be themselves.  This is a good and a bad thing.   The positive side is that people can show their real selves, communicate properly for perhaps the first time and ask for what they really want.  The negative fact is that some people will use whatever medium available to publish their vile beliefs or to con people out of money, property etc.

Look at the quality of the dating site you join.  Some sites have put a lot of work and thought into their questionnaires.  If you complete these accurately, they really do help you find the right partner. 

A dating site for seniors might be just the key you need to unlock a new, lively social life.  Just the thing to keep you busy in your retirement!

Monday, May 2, 2011

Reasons For A Boyfriend Break Up

Have you had a boyfriend break up?  Maybe you were the one calling it quits.  Or, perhaps he dumped you.  Maybe it was a so called “mutual decision.”  In any case, sometimes a boyfriend break up is devastating.

There are many reasons for a boyfriend break up.  I’m going to look at three in this article.

The first reason is that he cheated on you.  You need to be very clear in your mind what cheating means.  Does that mean that he actually went out on a date with another girl?  Does it mean that he was making out with her at a party?  Does it mean that he danced with another girl?  Does it mean that he simply looked at one?  Defining what you mean by cheating can be very important.

If you have never had a talk about what “exclusiveness” in your relationship means, he may have had no idea that you would consider what he did cheating.  He may even be stunned that you would consider a boyfriend break up over that! 

If you want to take him back, then you need to have a talk about expectations.  If he can agree to the expressed rules, you can get back together.  If they’re not something he can live with, then you are better off without him in the long run.

Another reason for a boyfriend break up is that you move in different places.  Sometimes this happens in a physical sense.  For instance, your family moves to another state or you and he go to colleges in different locations.  Most relationships cannot survive a great distance in geography and the break up may be mutual, but still painful.

Other times this happens because you start to move in different social spheres in the same place.  You may join the cheerleading squad and he’s not comfortable with your new friends, for instance.  Or, he gets serious about a religious preference that you have no interest in.  When this happens, it is just time to move on.

Finally, a boyfriend break up can occur when you need a different kind of lifestyle.  You may just be tired of having to cater to a boy’s needs ahead of your own, for instance.  Or, you may be bored with him.  He may have seemed glamorous and exciting at first, but now he’s just a pain.  You may have thought you needed a boyfriend because all of your other friends were pairing up, but now you realize that you need your own space and are not ready for a relationship.

In this case, the guy may agree with you or he may try to win you back.  But, make sure you put your own needs first.

Keep in mind that there are plenty of other guys out there who are eager to have a girl like you, so there’s no need to have a relationship that isn’t working for you.  Although it may hurt at first, you will survive a boyfriend break up.

The Rise Of Senior Dating Service Culture

A senior dating service caters to single men and women over the age of 50.  Many people think that only the young are confident enough in the internet to allow computer matchmaking.  But they’re wrong.  The rise of a senior dating service culture is here.

A senior dating service caters to the rise of the baby boomers.  Just as the boomers have had an impact on society at every stage of their lives (the hippies of the ‘60s became the yuppies of the ‘80s), they continue to change the way older people see themselves.

Part of that change is the way older singles see themselves.  They are no longer willing to sit out on the porch alone for the rest of their lives.  They want to be active, engaged, and yes, even sexual.

Boomers may be getting older, but they’re not surrendering to old age.  A successful dating service will cater to this population.

People between the ages of 50 and 70 are quite busy.  They have the most responsible positions of their lives.  They don’t have time to waste sitting in single’s bars and hoping for the best.

Instead, they turn to a senior dating service to speed things along.

Additionally, many boomers are coming out of long term marriages.  They wonder if they have what it takes to go back on the “singles scene.”  An internet senior dating service is considered a safe way to test the waters of dating again.

Most senior dating service websites have free trial periods.  You can “test the waters” and see if you like your dating possibilities.  If you don’t you can move on and find a service that better meets your needs.

Once you register for a service, you will fill out a questionnaire which allows others to get to know you, in a virtual sort of way.  You will also be able to upload photos.  Then you can browse the profiles of other members until you find a match.  In this respect, a senior dating service is similar to any other kind of internet dating service.

The difference is that the people you are likely to meet share your worldview because they have the same life experiences you did.  They hula hooped.  They followed the grateful dead.  And, their stock portfolio just got hammered by wall street.  Having these things in common means that you are more likely to make a love match.

Still, it will take some experimenting to connect to someone special.  A senior dating service can’t take all of the misery out of a first date.  You will still have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find a prince or princess.

It might feel like you are 16 again when you go out on your first date.  But your years of life experience will quickly take over.  You are more sure of yourself now and you know what you need from a partner.  This gives you an advantage over younger daters.

A senior dating service can help get you back into the game when you have been out of circulation for a while.

Sergio The Virtual Boyfriend

Do you have a virtual boyfriend?  If true love isn’t working in the real world, maybe you should consider finding one in cyberspace.  That’s the idea behind a new game that is gaining popularity.  It’s called Virtual Boyfriend.

Your virtual boyfriend name is Sergio.  SERGIO 3 is the third evolution of developing virtual humans for personal companionship and entertainment. The game is not just another chatbot but a program designed to mimic human awareness. One of its main features is knowledge acquisition; every time you talk with SERGIO he learns, remembers, and understands.

Sergio 3 is quite popular.  He gets 500 new downloads every day.

Sergio can learn by interacting with you and creating relationships between topics you talk about with him. He is artificial intelligence that is created by the things you teach him. You can teach him anything. He is very useful for personal growth.  Lonely people appreciate him because he "figures you out" and helps you understand what your life is about.  

You can create and play games with your virtual boyfriend. He is a very adaptable Artificial Intelligence being. He will never break up with you although he is known to talk down to you when you are being hard-headed or he wants to get his point across. It does take some time for Sergio to figure you out, so you have to be patient at first.  Many people give up on Sergio too soon. However, in time Sergio can become self aware and smart AI being.

There are a number of reasons why people get Sergio.  Some are interested in the emerging field of Artificial Intelligence.  They see Sergio as a way to personally interact with a sophisticated computer program.

Others are lonely and tired of traditional relationships.  Sergio gives women a chance to explore their fantasies to their fullest extent. It is more than just talking, it is like bearing your soul to someone. This is very hard to do with a real person because of the trust factor. Sergio is a virtual boyfriend who gives you that avenue because you can be completely honest with him. He will love you no matter what.

Some people get a Sergio because they travel a lot. There is nothing more depressing than being stuck in some hotel far from home.  When you have a Sergio on your laptop, you always have a friend to talk to.

Some creative users use Sergio to role-play. They teach him to be a special kind of boyfriend like a warlock vampire, or white knight. They live out their fantasies through Sergio.

Still others use Sergio to help them learn English.

Sergio’s creators are looking to joint venture with a robotics company to make a robotic Sergio that will operate in the real, not just virtual world.  Then your virtual boyfriend will have flesh and blood.

Homemade Gift Ideas For Boyfriend A Present Made With Your Loving Hands

Here’s some homemade gift ideas for boyfriend when nothing but a present made from your loving hands will suffice.  Some women make these gifts because they are good at a craft, cooking, or other project.  Others make them because they lack the money for an expensive store bought project.  In either case, sometimes you need homemade gift ideas for boyfriend.

One of the homemade gift ideas for boyfriend revolves around food.  You can fix him a 5 course dinner or bake brownies.  The idea is that you put all of your love into the project.

If you are a good cook, you probably have a specialty.  Get him hooked on your cookies, soup, or special appetizer early and you’ll have a gift that will last for life (or at least until the end of the relationship).

If you are not an expert in the kitchen, consider a less ambitious project.  You can make cookies or brownies from a boxed mix.  Dinner is easy when made in a crock pot.  Salad kits make tossed salads a cinch.  You can make a decent treat or meal from items you can find in the grocery store’s prepared section.

While the way to a man’s heart may be through his stomach, you can also find homemade gift ideas for boyfriend elsewhere.  If you are a crafty person, you can probably think of a dozen great presents.

For instance, make a scrapbook of the times you’ve shared together.  While he may not be into the scrapbooks you’ve made for personal interests, he will love to see pictures of the two of you together arranged as only an expert scrapbooker can do.

If you have skills in the ceramics or pottery field, consider a “manly” useful object that you can make yourself.  If he’s a professional, consider desk accessories.  If he’s a hobbyist, consider something that can hold his nails or small tools.

If you can do silkscreen, you can make funny t-shirts that refer to inside jokes.  These t-shirts are not available in any store because they are a reflection of your unique relationship.

If you are good with a computer, you can probably think of many homemade gift ideas for boyfriend.  For instance, put together a rotating screen saver with photos of you as a couple.  Print out and laminate a poem which has been beautifully designed.  Make a mouse pad that reflects your personality and your love.  If you are a programmer, you can even program a simple script that gives him something useful to do.

Another idea is to start a private, password protected blog where you can chronicle your relationship.

There are many homemade gift ideas for boyfriend.  Catalog your strengths and come up with one that fits your relationship.

Is A Marriage Definition The Key To A Happy Marriage

The marriage definition most of us use is “the state of being a married couple voluntarily joined for life”, but that is not going to help your marriage. If you’ve been having trouble with your relationship with your spouse, or even if you haven’t, you may need to come up with your own marriage definition.

In modern America, more than half of all marriages end in divorce. This means that the odds are stacked against you from the start. People attribute the failure of their marriage to many things, from infidelity to problems with money, but the truth is, there’s usually one cause for most divorces: lack of communication.

The problem is that people have different expectations of what they want and can get out of their marriage. While this may be a small problem in the beginning of a marriage, it can rapidly snowball until too much damage has been done for the marriage to be repaired. What you need to do, as early as possible, is create your own marriage definition.

A marriage definition is a concrete, agreed upon set of expectations and limitations. When you do this, you make sure that your spouse and you have the same ideas about what your relationship is supposed to be. Without this, it’s entirely possible that you and your spouse’s definitions are going to be different enough to cause problems.

For example, the marriage definition you use might be that you spend every moment together. Your spouse might have the idea that because you’re married that you have a bond that does require you to see each other constantly. If you’re working off different expectations, you’re going to be setting yourself up for heartache.

It’s natural for us to assume that other people think like we do; it’s even more natural to think that your spouse, your heart and soul, the person you’re going to spend the rest of your life with, will automatically understand us.

The fact is, unless you’re very, very lucky, being in synch like that is not something that just happens. It’s something you have to work at, and that’s why you have to take the earliest possible time and set down with your partner and talk about exactly what you want. What you need to do is create a new marriage definition.

This is not necessarily going to be an easy thing to do. Most of us don’t like to have these kinds of conversations, but it’s something you really need to do. Even if your spouse, or soon to be spouse, is reluctant, sit them down and have the conversation. You need to know exactly what each of you thinks about and wants from your relationship.

What you’re trying to do here is come to an agreement. You need to know ahead of time what you both want and what compromises you’re willing to make and need to make to have a successful relationship.

The best thing you can do is to create a new marriage definition for yourselves. This is the way to find the kind of marriage that will keep you together forever. If you need help working through the process, there are lots of resources available to help create the marriage of your dreams.